A tiny feather on a monkey cap…

Wooohooo!!!! I just earned my first blog award… I should thank Anto for this honor, and I hope he realizes what a big morale booster this has been for me. Yippeeee!!!

This moment reminds of a few words that Morgan Freeman uttered in an award show –

“I do know there are a lot of people who seem to be in my corner, and that’s, of course, wonderful. I’m really more interested in the nomination than in the award, because I think the nomination just puts you within a group of outstanding actors.”

Morgan Freeman

I do agree with him on that point. It’s flattering to be put in a group of awe-inspiring writers. Okay, I should zip my fingers and stop that gyaan right here. Well Anto’s rules were that I should share seven points about myself.

I know Anto has a lot of patience when it comes to sincerely reading blogs, but after all my ranting and raving in Knock knock it’s me, writing some more about myself on those same lines sounds nauseating even to me. I mean, come on, I already heard a rumor that I am going to be banned from using English if I don’t start writing posts where I shut up after writing a few meaningful lines. I really can’t even imagine anyone who would be desperate(?!) to know anything more about me after having read that post. The only possible interest for the reader might be creating a public hate group for narcissists like me.

Okay, so there I start rumbling non-stop again. Fine yeah I hear your grumbling as well. Before you start hitting your monitor, I’ll explain what I’m about to do now. I was forwarded a mail where I had to answer guilty/innocent for each question and then pass that along to other friends. I do know that the same brutal game has been going on in blogosphere where folks tag each other with no mercy. So yes, I am going to answer those questions here – not that you would like me any better after you get enlightened that way, but it still fills up space here, and then I am going to tag all my blog-friends I spite (:P).

Note: Anto, you are tagged, no choice there. The bloggers to whom I pass on this award are tagged. 🙂 And if you are reading this, you are tagged. You will have to copy-paste the questions in your blog, and send me a link to your post after you publish it. Don’t try to evade. If you read this and do not post this in your blog, you would hang upside down in Hell for a thousand years. 😛

  1. Asked someone to marry you? Innocent. Err, it counts only if I actually asked out loud, right? Because, thanks to Pepsi Ungal Choice which started being aired when I was 10, I do remember wanting to ask at least 4 actors on the phone if they would marry me.
  2. Ever kissed someone of the same sex? Guilty. Hold it! It’s not what your dirty mind imagines. There are other purposes in kissing a lady (in my case) other than romantic inclinations! I was only referring to me kissing my mom. Amen.
  3. Danced on a table in a bar? Innocent. Well of course, on both the points – dancing on a table, being to a bar. 🙂 But dancing in the terrace water tank doesn’t have to be admitted here, does it?
  4. Ever told a lie? Guilty. Of course. You poor soul, if you expected anyone would say innocent there, except maybe Mahatma Gandhi, you must be living in a cave. And again, we all know how Gandhiji was paid for having been truthful.
  5. Kissed a picture? Innocent. Disappointing to know there are girls who don’t take cues from Karan Johar / Aditya Chopra / Suraj Barjatya movies, right?
  6. Slept in until 5 PM? Guilty. Now don’t you dare ask if I’ve slept in later than that. You should already be knowing by now. 😛
  7. Fallen asleep at work/school? Guilty. Err, very very very very very (you get the idea right) guilty.
  8. Held a snake? Innocent. I have dissected one cruelly in Zoology class. After it was sedated heavily of course. But that’s not the same as holding it, is it?
  9. Been suspended from school? Innocent. Had always been this “exasperatingly-dumb-and-naughty-but-just-not-bad-enough-to-throw-out” types. 🙂 *Clap clap*
  10. Worked at a fast food restaurant? Innocent. But I would have made a good employee – at least in Pizza Hut – I would have chattered non-stop with any home delivery caller and by the time he/she realizes we haven’t delivered their pizzas even after 1.5 hours, the customer is already a hopeless mental case.
  11. Stolen from a store? Innocent. Have broken hundreds of things and have talked my way out of paying for them. But that’s not as evil as stealing you see.
  12. Been fired from a job? Innocent. If I had been guilty on this, for my cranky temper, I would have been guilty of murdering a few souls too.
  13. Done something you regret? Guilty. That “something” must have been the understatement of this decade.
  14. Laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose? Guilty. Grrrrr, I hate the person who sent me this mail now. This is embarrassing to admit.
  15. Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Innocent. Snowflakes? I don’t even know how one looks. Yow mail sender, I was born and brought up in Chennai. (in Quick Gun Murugan style) You might have lightning and thunder, but we Chennaiites hold that blazing Sun with bare fingers and make omelettes on our palms. Mind it!
  16. Kissed in the rain? Innocent. Well the question didn’t specify the subject… or the object… or whatever it is…
  17. Sat on a roof top? Guilty. I even had a secret treasure hoard there, to save peacock feathers… Is that animal rights violation? Oops me and my big mouth.
  18. Kissed someone you shouldn’t? Innocent. We are getting hung up on the “shouldn’t” here, aren’t we? It’s like acting in a Maniratnam movie – Q. Have you? A. Have I what? Q. Kissed? A. Kissed who? Q. Someone? A. Someone who? Q. Someone you shouldn’t? A. What? Q. Have you? A. Have I what?…….. *and it continues*
  19. Sang in the shower? Guilty. Daily. In the hostel. Also guilty of that when someone else in the hostel got into the shower. Well at least it was effective in making them vacate the shower room sooner than what they would have  planned.
  20. Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? Guilty. Well Chennai has the biggest play pool – the Marina beach of course, and guess who must have been dipped in it 12 times as part of a dumb bet? Yours truly 😦 😦
  21. Shaved your head? Guilty – if it applies to having my head be shaved by my parents (before I turned two) and Innocent – if it means me shaving my own head.. I may be wild, but come on, this would be too much.
  22. Had a boxing membership? Innocent. That doesn’t make me gentle. Do I need a membership to hit someone I don’t like?
  23. Made a girlfriend cry? Guilty. What did you think was the main entertainment in girls hostels? We competed in weeping and crying for no reason.
  24. Been in a band? Innocent. If you count the apartment kids anthakshari group, then guilty. 🙂
  25. Shot a gun? Innocent. Glory be to the Lord for such small mercies.
  26. Donated Blood? Guilty. Once, and then like Vadivelu in Thalainagaram, I refused to take off the band-aid and proclaimed to everyone for a week “Yeeh ellarum kelunga, naanum blood donor, naanum blood donor, naanum blood donor.” (Means: listen all you mortal souls, I am a blood donor too) 🙂
  27. Eaten alligator meat? Innocent. What??!!! Yuck!
  28. Eaten cheesecake? Guilty. I have snatched it off others plates too. That makes me what, double guilty?
  29. Still love someone you shouldn’t? Innocent. Oh boy, this is really getting on my nerves now. Dear mail sender, let’s get this straight once and for all, okay? Who is that mysterious person I “shouldn’t” love or kiss or even think of? An ex, a crush, a friend’s husband? Then my answer holds good. I am really innocent. *clap clap*
  30. Have/had a tattoo? Innocent. I mean, there is a limit to torturing my parents, right?
  31. Liked someone, but will never tell who? Innocent. If I can’t tell, why would I ever like them? Moral of sour grapes story. 🙂
  32. Been too honest? Innocent. Ha ha ha 🙂 You thought you trapped me there right? I am usually dishonest by default, except on certain instances like when answering this question.
  33. Ruined a surprise? Guilty! What can be a more cruel punishment for someone you can’t tolerate – Hail Hitler!
  34. Ate in a restaurant and got really bloated that you couldn’t walk afterward? Guilty. How I got home is a bit hazy in my memory but I do remember being lifted up and plonked out of the restaurant door by a few white-clad folks…
  35. Erased someone in your friends list? Guilty. Second-best choice to avenge your self esteem. 😛
  36. Dressed in a woman’s clothes (if you’re a guy) or man’s clothes (if you’re a girl)? Guilty. Huh, how does a daughter’s existence get completed without wearing dad’s clothes? In fact he is still wondering what happened to his new blue flannel shirt, the one that I sneaked out for the Marina Beach outing with friends and ended up soaking it beyond repair.
  37. Joined a pageant? Innocent. What? Was that even a serious question? The one where they all say they want world peace? I read a Suresh Menon article where he had written about this beauty queen who had memorized the answers. The organizers changed the question order and were rewarded with a shocker when she answered “deprived children” when she was asked what she had for breakfast.
  38. Been told that you’re handsome or beautiful by someone who totally meant what they said? Guilty. Now come on, do humor my ego sometimes.
  39. Had communication with your ex? Innocent. No XYZ 🙂 Howzzzat?
  40. Got totally drunk on the night before exam? Innocent.
  41. Got totally angry that you cried so hard? Innocent. Well crying never drives home a point. On the other hand, getting totally angry and locking the accused up in the bathroom might teach them a lesson.

Whew! One tense assignment that was. I genuinely think these bloggers deserve this award and I am privileged to be passing it onto them (please remember the tag condition guys):

LEB

Satyakam

Calvy

Lash

Pria

Priya

Mohan

BullsEye

Nomad Indian

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20 comments

  1. Thanks much for the award and the 150000 questions …. fyi … I have flunked several exams… so this should be a breeze … 😉

  2. Thanks for the award girl;))

    I wonder its less guilty and more innocent means the vice verse huh.. Just kidding. Sure will take up soon.

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